Prayers.
Current mood: Worried
Current music: Mt. Gagazet Theme (FFX-2)

I received a message today. Something about saying "Our Father" and three "Hail Mary's" and then sending out the message to nine people and something good will happen four days after. I think it's a chain, but anyway, it's a prayer chain, so I thought I might try it out.

Anyway, when I started to recite the prayer(s), for a brief moment, I forgot what they are, and I was a bit alarmed. Even though there was a lot of bullshit going on in my religion, even though I don't care much about devotions and mass eucharists and things like that, and even though my mind is always flying every time I go to mass, I still keep my faith intact. I believe in God and I believe in my religion--just not in the people and the organizations in my country who run it. I believe in the faith itself, not in the people who keep saying that they symbolize and spread the faith.

So yeah...I was a bit alarmed. At some point, though, I started to remember the prayers, much to my relief. I want to prove to myself that, at the very least, I still keep that inside of me, that I haven't quite lost it yet. I never believed everything my elementary school teachers taught me back in those days, but one thing I do believe is that you lose a part of yourself if you've lost your faith in something you've had faith in for a very long time--especially something that was ever-constant and unchangeable--like God (other things don't count).

Just to prove to myself that I haven't forgotten those prayers, here they are:

Our Father who art in Heaven,
Hallowed be thy name,
Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done on Earth
As it is in Heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
And forgive us our sins,
As we forgive those who have sinned against us.
And do not bring us to the test,
But deliver us from evil.
Amen.

Hail Mary, full of Grace,
The Lord is with you.
Blessed are you amongst women,
And blessed is the fruit of your womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, mother of God,
Pray for us sinners.
Now, and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

Yes, sometimes I do curse the heavens. I explore the concepts of religion and sex and all the seven deadly sins a lot. I explore the different forms of cultism to my heart's desire. I praise Dante Alighieri and his Inferno, Purgatorio, and Paradiso. I do a lot of things other people would no doubt raise their eyebrows upon (premarital sex counts), but I do have faith, and beliefs. Maybe I don't live by them, but I have them.

Well, either that, or I'm just trying to convince myself.

Am I...?

Whatever.

Current Mood: Relieved and Weirded out
Current Music: FFX-2 Boss Fight Theme (That STUPID Garik is a toughie)