Note:This is a two-way conversation between a stony assassin and a life-sized fruit. If you have any comments, suggestions, marriage proposals, death threats, ransom notes, whatever, just contact either one of them at their respective contact information.
Just to remind you, you are NOT being welcomed into this private haven. Do you hear me? This is MY bookcase, MY private property, and the only thing you can do is LOOK. You MAY NOT touch anything and I mean NOT a single piece of cloth or wood or papRSHT--? WHAT?
Can you go ahead and do it already?*impatient* Hey guys! I just have to say this: he--*points to Aya*--put up quite a fight. So consider yourself lucky you are viewing this page! Man, this cost me quite some money...before you go on, I recommend you read this so you will know how hard it was for me to create this particular segment.
And another thing...OW! Hey!*a large pale hand shoves life-sized fruit aside and goes in front of imaginary camera*
Will you shut up now and let me do my thing?*life-sized fruit rolls eyes* Hrr...How do I start? I don't even know what this--*holds up a sheet*--is all about...Waking Onto Lantern's Bright by Deena? Hmm...hrr? Ok...this one is a fanfic about uh...about uh...me and uh...*slowly reddens*...Ken.
*life-sized fruit interrupts*It's a yaoi about you and Ken-kun, Aya-kun. And it's very good.
Yeah....*urk* ya...yaoi. *cough* Will you SHUT UP? Okayy...*ahem, ahem* next is uh...hmm...? The Fifth by Flori? Her? This...? What on earth...hey! We don't have a fifth member! There are only FOUR of us. FOUR, OK? And--
*fruit rolls eyes*it's a FIC, Aya-kun, and there are only three parts of it right now. Flori's a busy person and she was only able to do a Chapter 1, Chapter 2 and Chapter 3. You know what "fiction" means?
Ah....of course! Hey, this looks interesting...When You Gonna Learn *murmurs* that sounds...like...Yohji's...tatoo...? Hmm...*sits down and starts reading* it's pretty long, too. Let's see...Prologue, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12 and a final one...
*AFTER SOME TIME*
Hey, Aya-kun!*waves a hand in front of his face* You OK?
Hmph.*sniff, sniff* who *sniff* wrote -this-?
YS did, Aya-kun...did you read everything? There's anafterword, you know...
YES, YES! I KNOW! I read everything! There! You satisfied? It made me cry.*sniff* Yohji...his struggles....Omi and Ken....MY struggles...*eyes wobble SD-style* It's all too much! HOO-HOO! *sniffs and buries head under pillow*
*Aya-kun is crying?*Eh...? There, there, Aya-kun...it's OK...*pats his shoulder*
*glares at fruit*This is ALL your FAULT! You rotten fruit! Now they *points to audience* are gonna think I'm a weakling! And all because YOU made me do -this-? And for what? A measly seventy-five bucks!
Well, gee--sorry. I haven't got a lot of money! I'm not rich! And besides, Aya-kun, what makes you so sure that they would do that? Your fans love you! Even I do! Now can you just get on with it?
*sniff*Hmph. Next fic is a yaoi...yaoi again? And this one's about Ken and Van...wait a minute! Who's Van Fanel?
The hero in Escaflowne...you know?
Oh...the boy riding that dragon whatchamacallit?
Ok...it's written by Van Donovan, and the fic is linked to his page. The title isThe White King and the Dark Lord Mage...why do you like so much yaoi?
I LIKE yaoi. I'm a hentai, Aya-kun, didn't you know that? And why are you asking anyway. Hey...I'll bet you're JEALOUS coz Ken-kun's been paired up with someone else other than you...*sly grin* are YOU?
*mutters*Just shut up. The next one is Y-O-K-A...? What on earth does that mean?
Yohji-Omi-Ken-Aya, silly! Reflection wrote that one...it's not finished yet but it's very good. It's a yaoi.
WHAT?!?!? Yaoi AGAIN? Who? Me and Yohji? Omi and Ken?
No...Omi-kun and Yohji-kun, YOU and Ken-kun.
Me and Ken...*blushes* again? Why do you like yaoi so much?
Why do you ask? Aya-kun, are you denying that there's something going on between you and Ken-kun? Are you denying it?
I didn't say anything!
So, you're SAYING that you and Ken-kun are...an i-MMPPH*fruit struggles as a hand clamps over her mouth*
MOVING ON....the next fic is a closer look at me, the guys and those Schwarz pests five years in the future...the title of this fic isIn Five Years and it is linked to one of the co-author, Van Donovan's page.
You CAN speak decently, after all. And hey, in addition to what Aya-kun said, this contains yaoi implications and yaoi itself so consider yourselves warned if you're not a yaoi lover...Aya-kun?
Hn. The next fic is temporarily calledEndless Black and it's written by...uh...*cough*...uh...*cough,cough* uhm, by uh...*cough, cough, cough*
Oh, COME NOW! Written by ME! Why can't you say it nicely?
Hn. Good thing it isn't yaoi. Before reading the whole thing, readthis first. As of now, Apple-chan the author only has that and the Prologue available. The next part's coming up soon. Are we through yet?
Yeah, almost. You just need to say goodbye.
Do I have to?
Ok.*ahem* It is now time for you to get out of here. So scram. Do you hear me? SCRAM!
*sigh*Can't you be nice just for once?
So what do you want me to say?
Something nice and polite. Anything! Ok, ok, just read this.*hands a sheet of paper to Aya-kun*
Hmph.*snatches the paper* All original Weiß Kreuz characters are (c) Koyasu Takehito and Project Weiß, 1998-1999. Likewise, all original characters, fanart and fanfictioon here are (c) of the people who made them, Apple-chan included. Now you people get out of here before I lose my patience and slash all your throats *threatening look* GOT THAT?
Aya-kun, you can't tell them to go! They can stay as long as they want to! I PAID YOU!
*rolls eyes*Hrr, alright. Just tell me when you're ready to leave and I will personally kick--I mean, escort you out back to The Flowershop.